October 25, 2013
You don’t have to say it. Not a word needs to be uttered.
I understand it all so perfectly.
It’s like driving along the coast at sunset, the sky cast in that pinkish orange hombre, pure beauty cast against a stark reality. I’m driving toward that neverending horizon that’s frozen in time, not a detail changed. The dark sea twinkles at me prettily as the sky guides me along that clean path like an overly affectionate friend. Go on, they tell me, keep driving. There have been some hard days but this evening has no room for that. This road drowns out the bad and the difficult and perfection is left standing bare. I exhale a long breath and it all sinks to the pit of my stomach, grounding me in uninterrupted contentment.
And then I hear your raspy voice in the distance. You’re singing like a madman, your drunken syllables all melding into a sweet mess. I love you till the end, you sing to me from across the sea. The wind sways me this way and that and the moon is coming out to say hello. I keep on driving until I get somewhere I like. And you are suddenly there beside me, your eyes glowing in the dark as you look at me. You know, our kind of silence is the stuff of song.
I love you till the end.
September 10, 2013
We are the children of our parents, grown from the dry earth one season into the moistness of another. Our colors are bright in the darkness where we shine best under that dim glow, like rose gold and yellow diamonds. Put us under the scrutiny of daylight and you will see our skin shine like obsidian, like gold dust, like unpolished tourmaline. We are the perfectly imperfect creatures bought into the world to live alongside each other. What does contentment look in our line of vision? Success in measurable units, within defined scopes of accomplishment. Some of us are not as lucky as others to be thrust into such bona fide wisdom so we roam farther and deeper toward the edge. Artists we may be, nullified creative heads worth a penny or three. Oh but we dream in generous doses. We see entire galaxies dancing around us, astrological beings whispering into our willing ears, telling us what we seek is at the end, at the finish of that goal. The one filled with glorious purpose. And despite our renewed hopes our sense of direction remains the same. We wake up to our deafening realities, those poised situations and lofty burdens. Should we call this one form of wealth?
Well I don’t feel better when I’m fucking around,
and I don’t write better when I’m stuck in the ground,
so don’t teach me a lesson ’cause I’ve already learned,
yes the sun will be shining and my children will burn.
Chris Thile – Heart In A Cage
August 18, 2013
I could never tell you,
not in a thousand years,
the sad soul that I am.
And you in your ways,
refusing the heart she held in her hand,
breaking your own in return.
I am your second best,
best being just enough to love,
and I understand it so perfectly.
You remind me of his shadow,
I stay close to you now,
it makes up for the lost comfort.
We would make beautiful halves,
in some day of another lifetime,
but here we are, you and I,
inept in the proper ways of togetherness,
as we are two people
who are so far removed and
too different to be one.
August 6, 2013
I often write of solitude as I know it well.
Who is rash enough to live in a world full of those they only merely know?
I do not find this courage easily
and it becomes increasingly difficult as I grow up,
as I change into the lady I think I should be.
Expectations have a way of leading me on,
they coax me into false entitlement,
they whisper sweetly into my ear
and I am lured into that familiar trap.
I live in a world that may not exist,
a place buried deep in the mind of strangers,
to a point of disappearing altogether.
The sometimes unexplainable love I have for life
somehow will not justify the reality.
Your words make me wonder,
they weave in and out of my dreams in the dark,
they are a cacophonous blend of sounds.
Where would you end were I to begin again?
I find myself lost in the tangle of time,
roaming this starry expanse with nowhere to finish.
Do I fall into that uncomfortable chaos
or reside here in this perfect stillness?
Would I wander aimlessly into the future
as my heart tells me to hold onto that fleeting second?
Life may be defined by how far-reaching one’s affections are,
yet I am profoundly dazed.
I am lost, I am retired.